Snow White and the Huntsman Review

Much like the poisoned apple from its story 'Snow White and the Huntsman' looks great. It's colour and feel will make your mouth water but after one bite you're sure to stagger around for a dramatic moment and die. Director Rupert Sanders has given us a visually appealing film but sadly the special-effects are not enough to save this frustrating drivel.

Marred by lazy writing, off-putting performances, chaotic camera work and choppy editing the film attempts to retell the classic story of Snow White. In keeping with the audience's presumed thirst for darker and edgier stories the familiar elements are all corrupted. This actually works quite well and had the filmmakers been less lazy in the telling of their story we might have had a worthy addition to the fantasy genre. As it stands 'Snow White and the Huntsman' is a huge bore.  

The casting, however, is inspired. Charlize Theron steals the show as the evil queen, looking for eternal youth. Kirsten Stewart pales (they didn't call her Snow White for nothing) in comparison. The young actress has little to no charm, making her a very boring protagonist. 

The casting of Stewart seems to betray a level of cynicism on the part of the filmmakers. Especially, because underneath all the fairy tale stylings the film feels like a new version of 'Twilight'. For instance, the film feels the need to add a romantic subplot in which Snow White is torn between the hardened Huntsman (Chris Hemsworth) and her childhood love William (Sam Claflin). Which side are you on? Team Huntsman or Team Will? Whichever way, we all lose. 

The eight dwarfs (Yes, apparently you need seven of them to get people to see your movie these days.) consist of a company of well-known Britisch actors. And even though it was fun to see them together like this, the film does not give them anything interesting to do. In fact, they act rather peculiar. It's as if the actors themselves are not quite sure about what's expected from them.  

In between the film manages to steal shamelessly from other fantasy films, such as 'The Neverending Story', 'The Chronicles of Narnia' and of course 'The Lord of the Rings'. It's sad, because Sanders certainly gets the look right. But never is there a moment of genuine wonder or excitement. The characters, except for the dwarves and Theron's queen, seem to be made from carboard, pretty cardboard, but that ain't saying much. 

Iron Sky Review

No, this isn't some weird conspiracy theory, rather it's the premise of the movie 'Iron Sky'. The project originated from Finland where a group of amateur filmmakers set out to use the internet to get their movie financed. On their website Wreck a Movie the producers established an online community of film fans. People connected to this community could donate money or otherwise aid the filmmakers.

The film's concept is ludicrous. In the last days of the Second World War the Germans execute a secret mission. Their plan is to use their anti-gravity technology to colonize the moon. Amazingly, they succeed and while old Adolf is blowing his brains out in Berlin, his sympathizers are bouncing around the moon. In 'Iron Sky' we see what happens when the vengeful Space Nazis return.

I've been following this production ever since I saw this enticing teaser back in 2008. Due to the nature of the project it took a long time to get started. But judging from the film this way of filmmaking works quite well for director Timo Vuorensola. Fortunately, the film doesn't take itself too seriously. After all, 'Iron Sky' is about goddamn Space Nazis!

The film opens in 2018 with a moon landing, executed primarily to boost the current US president's approval ratings. Quickly, the two astronauts encounter a group of Nazi... Nazmonauts? Anyway, after dispatching one of the newcomers the Nazis arrest the survivor. They are surprised, and more than a little offended, to find a black man inside the suit with a computer the size of a moon rock.

The phone holds enough computing power to activate the Space Nazi's ultimate wunderwaffe. However, when the phone's battery goes dead so do their plans of invading Earth. Now the search is on for more cell phones.

In tone 'Iron Sky' seems like a cross between 'Mars Attacks!' and 'Starship Troopers'. Much like those two films the satire feels forced, but there a few moments of genuine comedy. In one scene there's a wink to 'Dr. Strangelove', which undoubtedly served as a major inspiration for Vuorensola. Unfortunately, the movie suffers from its amateur origins.

First off, the pacing is all over the place. More than once the film grinds to halt in order to deliver an elaborate and goofy gag. One of the them is a parody to 'Der Untergang'. This scene in particular is characteristic for 'Iron Sky'; it is a film which wears its nerdy fetishes on its sleeve.

Vuorensola's attempts at satire feel strangely dated, quite possibly due to the long time it took the produce the film. For instance, The US president and her slogan ''Yes she can!'' riff off of Sarah Palin and the 2008 election. With the next elections coming up in less than a year these references lose much of their power.

After four years of waiting you can't help but feel a bit disapointed. 'Iron Sky' has become nothing more than a curiosity. A film which you might watch once or twice just for the silly concept. However, as a piece of independent satire it falls flat.

There's no trace of the strange melancholy from the original teaser. The whole film is a just too goofy. One of the primary reasons why good satire works is because the people inside the movie don't know they're being satirized.